EarRelated Assumptions
by brakken
Summary: Kagome and Inuyasha. How to fix their relationship issues. Or not. Kagome has an idea, Inuyasha has an idea, and Miroku does too...wait...what! How did he know about that 'private' conversation? Sango knows too? Read to find out. Warning: absurd.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. I wish a friend had pulled a prank on me convincing me I did, just for those sweet moments of bliss until she started laughing in my face...sigh...  
**

**A/N: Mild hentai warning. And some dirty words. What else do you expect of me?  
**

**Ear-Related Assumptions**

_Here it is…now or never—_

She got up quickly, trying to look casual as she strode toward the hanyou sulking in the shade of the nearest tree. She pasted on a fake, 'confident' smile as she walked, and tried not to clench her fists too much with nerves. She was getting closer, closer, it was going to happen, she was sure of it—

"Kagome-chan, there you are! I was just wondering where you'd gone—"

_So close…so close…_the miko casted a forlorn glance over her shoulder as her oblivious friend dragged her back, talking about something or other. Her fingers twitched a bit in regret, wishing they were stroking silver hair, rather than the empty air.

When she got back to camp, Miroku had returned from his trip to gather firewood, and she had to start the fire, and then cook the fish, and then distribute it, and then clean up, then read Shippou his bedtime story… It was clear those few seconds of alone time with Inuyasha were to be the last for a while, and after she finished her chores, her thoughts were hard put to stray from that lost opportunity.

She sighed as she put her head in her hands, oblivious to the concerned looks of her friends across the fire.

_If only Sango had taken a minute or so longer getting back from the onsen, if only Miroku had taken more time to 'gather firewood' while Sango was gone, if only Shippou hadn't insisted on a long story, if only if only __if only__…_

It didn't take long for her simple regret to morph into self-doubt and self-deprecation.

_What was I thinking? It was a stupid idea anyway. I bet he would have hated it. That's as good as a sign shoved in his face that I think of him as some dog. I'm such a baka sometimes—to think I actually convinced myself that __this__ would be the __turning point__ for us—_

Meanwhile, an intense whispered conspiracy was taking form only a few feet away. (Inuyasha was, as usual, more or less oblivious—though he was on edge thanks to Kagome's normally high-flying clear and content scent stumbling about in worry and fear and hurt.)

"When did she start doing this?" Miroku murmured to the taijiya, so distracted by Kagome's strange silence that he didn't try to grope the woman even as she sat beside him, even as she leaned in closer to make the whispers work.

"When I got back from the onsen, but it's getting worse as the day goes by—" Sango replied, eyes flicking to Miroku for a moment, but sticking to her friend.

"Yes, I noticed that too—any ideas as to the cause?" he queried.

"Well, usually when she's down it's because of something Inuyasha's done or said, but so far I haven't seen a thing, and even if it happened earlier, wouldn't Shippou have ratted him out?" Sango bit her lip in worry.

"You have a good point, my dear Sango…I think it has to be related to the youth somehow, but perhaps this is a more subtle crime of his?" Miroku propositioned with a raised eyebrow.

Sango interjected with a frown: "Inuyasha's not exactly the subtle type—"

"Exactly. He probably did nothing overtly wrong, but given Kagome's sensitivity to him, she took something more from it and was hurt by it," he asserted, happy to have reached some feasible conclusion.

"What do you think we should do?" Sango's eyes were locked on Kagome; she hardly noticed how far she leaned toward the monk, or the lip she was chewing, or the hair that brushed his shoulder—but he did.

"I'm sure they can sort it out on their own, given enough privacy."

"Privacy?" The innocence in her tone; he could almost taste it.

"How does a walk to watch the stars sound?" he raised an eyebrow hopefully, restraining the urge to waggle it. This was for Kagome, he superimposed upon his other thoughts. For Kagome.

Sango smiled timidly, but sincerely, and it was only moments before they'd made their leave and their goodbyes—and were double timing it back to hide in some bushes to watch.

No reason to miss a good show, right?

* * *

Kagome blinked slowly, trying to take in the meaning of this unexpected chance, floundering in indecision. _Should I do it? Will it work, or will it backfire? Do I have enough time, or will they come back too soon like earlier? Am I already too late to try?_

Her eyes darted to the hanyou. He sat, cross-legged, his brow furrowed, his eyes cast in shadow from the firelight. He was brooding as usual—but over what? Now that she thought about it, she realized that he had no reason to be grumpy—and even if it was one of his petty upsets, it shouldn't have lasted this long…That decided it for her. She'd do it; she had to try to make him feel better, even if it didn't work. She owed him that, at least.

"Inuyasha?" she whispered as she crept over; she didn't want to startle him, after all.

"What," he grunted. He was still trying to figure out what the crazy shift in her scent meant—first annoyed, then frustrated, then discouraged and worried, then confused, and now nervous but confident? _What the fuck?!_ Just trying to follow that path gave him a headache.

She gulped. That was not an encouraging response. _For Inuyasha_, she chanted to herself.

She carefully kneeled down beside him, wrapping her arms around her legs, her hair falling over one shoulder, glinting red in the firelight. She noticed the uneasy way he shifted away from her, and equated it to her increased proximity. She didn't realize how right she was.

"Hey, don't do that—" she reached out one soft arm to bar his escape, worried at his twitchy demeanor. "I just wanted to talk, you know…"

He sighed and stopped squirming. Tried to, anyway. Was it his fault her eyes and hair and skin shone like that, her legs were all but on display, her sweet, finally resolved scent was clogging his every pore and weakening his restraint? He put an end to those thoughts as best he could.

"Fine. What about," he murmured back, focusing on her tone rather than her closeness. He still didn't dare actually face her—that would mean he'd be looking at her—

"Whatever has been bothering you all day. Don't pretend there hasn't been something the matter!"

_How the hell am I supposed to answer that?! Say that her scent going haywire affects me so damn much I can hardly think straight? That I'm pissed at myself for being so weak and hard up for her that I'm getting a boner just from having her sit too close to me? That'll go over sooo well…_

"Keh. It's none of your business," he answered, inside praying _please don't let her ask anyway, or let her get pissed over it, or—_

She just rolled her eyes at him. He felt quite relieved—until she stood and he knew he could see straight up her skirt if he turned his head the smallest fraction to the left—_gulp_.

"I kind of expected that…Here, does this make you feel, well, comfortable enough to talk?"

Before he could make a move, she dropped behind him and started massaging his ears.

Her fingers were gentle but firm, stroking from the base to the tips, her forearms braced against his shoulders, and her body…Her body was so close he could feel the heat against his back, and some of her hair was tickling his shoulders and mixing with his…It felt good, to have her so close—too good.

His hormones were dancing, his cock was crowing, and he definitely needed to get away before he did something he couldn't take back. There was only one problem: her death grip on his ears.

His elaborate escape planning was interrupted by an innocent, oblivious, completely vulnerable question.

"Inuyasha? I—you don't mind, do you, that I'm doing this? It doesn't—offend you, does it?" she asked hurriedly, arrested by the thought.

He barely managed to stifle the groan his body begged to answer her with. "Uh—no, I'm not—offended, Kagome…b-but—"

"Then what's wrong? You seem so tense...Did I do something wrong?"

He could hear the quaver in her tone at the thought, and he couldn't allow it to continue. Kagome was not allowed to be scared—and anything that did manage to scare her received his punishment. He reassured her on instinct, without realizing the consequences.

"Keh, don't be stupid. Of course you did nothing wrong."

"Then why are you so—why are your muscles so—why are your ears so—twitchy?" It was hard to describe the feeling she was getting through her fingers, but what it told her she was sure of. Something was definitely bothering him. And she intended to find out what.

"Are you worried about something?"

_Only that I'll turn around and start humping you like some animal!_ "Keh, don't worry about it, it's nothing," he deadpanned, trying to lean away, hoping her grip would loosen—

"Inuyasha…" she threatened. No such luck: her fingers followed her tone, stroking a forte on his ears.

"Why do you care?" he floundered, eyes flicking back and forth, ears straining against their vices like caged sparrows, searching for any possible venue or excuse to escape. A snake, Shippou waking up, a rabbit youkai, he'd try anything at this point, his blood was flooding south so fast—

His question got unexpected results. Her fingers froze, along with the rest of her; even her voice stopped its insistent interrogation, if only for a moment.

But when she did regain her voice again, he felt like shit. He could hear the waver, the hitch, the sniff: the telltale signs that she was going to cry.

"'Why do I care?' How can you say that, Inuyasha! Do you have _any_ idea how much I—do you have any _notion_ what I feel for y—you baka, do you think I do this for _nothing_?!"

She leaped to her feet, came to stand in front of him, her stunning, tear-filled eyes glaring down at him like scum.

Unfortunately, even if her warmth was gone, he could now see her, and the fire in her eyes turned him on as much as any of the rest had—save the weird thing with his ears, of course. He stood up quickly, before the view up her skirt became too much.

"Kagome," he said, instinctively reaching for her arm to keep her from running away, panicking as her scent shifted erratically between indignant fury and heartbroken hurt.

"Was it the thing with the ears? It was, wasn't it. I knew I shouldn't have tried that! I'm such an idiot! I just thought that, that, you might like it—baka, baka, baka! I should've known you'd hate it, hate me for doing it—but how could you lie to me and say different? How could you!—"

She was ranting, and it was beyond him to make any sense of it other than the fact it had to stop. He had no idea what had set her off—hell, he had no fucking _clue_ why or how this had started in the first place—but he had to end it.

He did the only logical thing, the only rational thing he could have done—considering the distribution of blood in his body (not exactly favoring his brain) and the look of the girl before him (amazing), the need to distract her and make her shut up, all bouncing around his skull at once—he kissed her.

She was caught off guard, to put it mildly. One second it seemed her dreams were crashing around her ears in a firestorm of idiotic ear-related assumptions, the next Inuyasha was kissing her.

His dry lips moved firmly against hers, he pulled her soft flesh flush with his solid wall, his insistent arms claimed her waist—his movements brooked no argument or confusion: he was kissing her, purposefully, meaningfully, wonderfully—

Wait, hold that thought—_what?!_

This was the guy that called her ugly, stupid, a wench and a bitch. This was the guy that had as good as equated seeing her naked with going blind. This was the guy who consistently ditched her to pine after and apologize to one of the coldest women Kagome had ever met.

He was brooding, crude, selfish, cocky, and not a little ruthless when it came to his enemies. He was infuriating, loyal, brave, honest, strong, protective, and had only given her one appearance-related compliment in her entire memory, and he was loopy and on the verge of death at the time.

Yes, she loved him, but there was no way he loved her. Not after what he'd just said, not after everything else.

But then—what in Kami's name was going on?!

Inuyasha was just starting to really relish the feel of her soft lips and softer waist, and deciding on new places for his hands and mouth to enjoy, when she pulled away.

Normally, he would have assumed the worst when he noticed her scent turn angry, but not this time. No, he was tired of tip-toeing that line in their relationship—he wanted her, she had certainly liked that for at least a few moments, and he refused to let go now that he had a taste of what he was missing.

"What?" They both asked, his a dare for her to break his hold, hers a confused beginning to sorting out the muddle in her mind.

"Why are you doing this?" The chorus continued, to their mutual consternation.

The frustration of asking the same question at the same time, the compounded confusion and anger at it, the distracting sensation of standing so close for so long came to a head in the next response, flattening all rational, diplomatic thoughts that might stand in the way of the dissemination of such vital information.

Neither meant for it to come out. But come out the real reason did:

"Because I love you, idiot!"

"Because I love you, idiot! But _you_ don't love me!"

They just stared at each other for a moment as their cries rang in the other's ears. Somehow, even in the jumble of words and sounds that had spewed out of both their mouths nearly simultaneously, they knew exactly what they, and the other, had said.

Crickets reigned supreme for a moment, the two individuals grappling desperately for some sense of what was going on.

The obvious question came first from Kagome (Inuyasha was still too shell-shocked to ask his own): "You do? Love me, I mean—"

"Keh, do you think I'm a liar?" he snarled back, happy to find something he was sure of. Now for the scarier things.

"Why the hell did you pull away if you loved me?" he rasped, not trying to think about it too much; he was still missing the feel of her lips, even now.

"B-because I thought you didn't! I was sure, I mean, especially after the ear thing—" she blurted out, eyes huge.

"_What_ ear thing? And what do you mean, you 'thought I didn't,' I was kissing you, for fuck's sake! What would I have to do to convince you, start making love to you?"

She blushed prettily at that; the distraction didn't help his focus, though it did give him a good feeling that she wasn't repulsed at the idea, as he'd half-expected.

"I, well, I thought that maybe, well, that maybe you'd like, well it starts with this movie I was watching on TV the other day, see, and there was this woman and this guy and she liked the guy and couldn't tell from his mixed signals whether he liked her or not, but he was always brooding and tense and everything, so she gave him a massage and it relaxed him enough to open up a bit, and so they kept doing it, and somewhere along the way he fell for her, and I was just thinking that maybe your ears would work the same way, and I know that's stupid and all, but I—"

He interrupted her ramble with the scrunched eyes of an impending headache. "Kagome! Stop, just, just tell it to me straight."

"I, well, I got this crazy idea that, that, that if I petted your ears, it might bring us together…and when you tried to get away, I though it was because you hated it—and when you asked why I cared, well—"

"Shut up for a second, ok?" She rolled her eyes; he'd already clamped a hand over her mouth, after all.

"Let me get this straight: you thought that petting my ears would, would 'bring us together'?"

She nodded slowly, as if it was physically painful to admit such perceived stupidity to him. It probably was.

"And you thought because I was pulling away, your chances were shot with me?"

Nod, eyes looking at anything else but him.

"And you thought I didn't love you because of this, but when I kissed you it didn't change your mind," he rolled his own eyes this time.

He sighed at her sad little nod. "Kagome…you are such a baka sometimes, you know that?"

After a pause to collect his thoughts, he released her mouth, fully expecting a torrent to await him. He didn't expect the shy smile and light blush dusting her cheeks, nor the simple question:

"Does this…mean that you…you _do_ love me?"

He stared at her a moment, wondering: _Is she serious? We go through all this idiocy, and she's still not sure??_ But she meant it.

"To hell with this shit. I'm going with plan B."

"Huh?" she gasped as he scooped her up and started walking toward some convenient trees. "What's plan B? Where are you taking me! Inuyasha, you never even answered my first question—_mmph!"_

His kiss was harder, though much quicker, merely a tease for the future, as he thought of it.

"Keh, plan B is what I said earlier: nothing else will convince you, so I'll just _make_ love to you till you get a clue."

* * *

"Wow…"

The taijiya and monk shared a look of bewilderment. Surprise, happiness, frustration, and anxiety had shuttled their way through the observers as the scene played out, but shocked confusion still reigned supreme. Neither had ever expected such a cataclysmic shift in their friends' relationship to occur so quickly. Neither understood how, either. It was positively baffling, the way they switched from indignant fury to hopefully loving within the span of seconds…and tiring too.

They let out a collective sigh of relief at the end of the conversation—Inuyasha had kissed Kagome again.

"I can't believe…!" Sango murmured.

"Me neither," Miroku assured her.

"To think that after so much time, it all changed so quickly—"

Inuyasha's voice loomed in, cutting off Sango's comment. "Keh, plan B is…"

The houshi and slayer froze. _Is Inuyasha's voice getting louder? __Did he just say that?__ Does this mean—_

The destruction of a few bushes only a few feet to the left of them answered their questions. With muffled curses worthy of the friend they were trying to avoid, they scrambled to get away.

After a few minutes clambering, panting, and scratches from the unruly vegetation, they were safe.

Another collective sigh—this time of relief.

"Thank all the Kami! I thought he'd catch us for sure!" Sango exclaimed in a whisper.

"I don't like to think what he would have done, should our interference have let Kagome get away…" Miroku breathed back, shaking his head.

"Oh, yes, poor Kagome-chan! Do you think we should—"

"No! Trust me Sango, Inuyasha is not in a mood to be interrupted right now…besides, didn't you see what leaving them alone for even a few moments did? Don't you think this will be better for them?"

Miroku believed what he was saying whole-heartedly. He also believed that this was a rare opportunity for some alone time with Sango and to miss it would be an utter sin.

"I suppose…I just…I worry about her, you know? She's very dear to me. And Inuyasha cares for her, and I know he'd never hurt her on purpose…but his mouth—"

"Is prone to hurting her anyway? You have a point, Sango my dear, though I would point out that we're hardly guiltless either," he murmured, sitting up a bit, gesturing for her to do the same. _Inuyasha has to be gone by now…_he thought to himself.

Sango kneeled, and fisted her hands in her green wrap-around skirt. "What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, tone suspicious, face frowning.

"Well, you saw him tonight. Wouldn't you say that he was more…candid with his feelings than usual? A lot of the things he says he says because he thinks he has to, for appearance's sake. Emotions like affection and kindness are construed as a weakness in his mind, so he's used to controlling them as much as possible," he answered with equanimity.

She opened her mouth, one hand covering her gape. "Oh! I never thought—! But you are right, you know. You can tell with the way he acts so annoyed when Kagome insists on some other act of charity…"

Miroku beamed. "I see you understand then. Of course, I am not in his head. I do not know these things for certain. But that is how it has always seemed to me. And I think tonight was good proof of this.

"But enough about Inuyasha…" he lightened his tone suddenly, taking her hand in his, leaning forward, eyes intent on hers.

"We have the night to ourselves, it seems. How will _we_ spend it, Sango?"

He punctuated his question with a nip to her ear.

* * *

**A/N:** Yes! I live! Well, not exactly. Been busy churning out (and, more terrifying yet, cutting to fit word limits!) essays for the past few months. Not my choice at all; trust me.

But I when I found the beginning of this sitting around on my computer, I couldn't help myself. I needed to have a bit of fun. So I reread it, shook it up a bit, added a bit more—and, depending on your response, I'll write a second chapter. I need the fluff for the sake of my sanity; one can only talk about herself for so long. Unless of course you're an egomaniac. But I don't quite fit under that category. So I'm stuck turning to writing fluff and fun for others for my mental stability.

And, in defense of this piece of writing—think of it as an exercise. A silly, fun, mindless bit of fluff and hentai-indulgence that started as an exercise.

And for any fellow Argentines out there--que te valgas la inocencia. The cliffhangers are my prank just for you, and the odd disclaimer my shout-out.

Hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
